helping

Here's a little tidbit about me and the kitchen.

In case you're wondering what that blue shape on her forehead is,
we went to a place called giggles and hugs.
 It's supposed to be a dolphin, but looks more like a dog to me.  Either way she could care less.  

I totally and completely let my kids help
with the making of treats.

But when it comes to dinner, for some reason I shoo them out of the kitchen.

I think I need the space and I often times don't want them seeing
everything I'm putting into their food.  Because I know their reaction to
actually seeing it going in is that they'll think they won't like it.

So I hide it creatively.
And meanwhile I'm not involving them in the food prep.

Back when I was sick with pneumonia and my husband was out of the country
working.  I was really not doing well and so I enlisted my kids.  They all made
salads and my son actually finished cooking the turkey burgers for them.

They were oh so excited to be helping with dinner.

And I realized why don't I do this more! Really, it was one of those major DUH moments.

SO they've been helping more with things like asparagus soup.

And do you know, they're eating more of it because they had a part of
MAKING it.

So there's a little picture me imperfectly confession.

Perhaps you're already on top of this and totally have your
kids in the kitchen at dinner time.
But for me it was an area where I realized I was majorly missing the mark.

And now they're asking, "What else can I do, What else can I do."

To the point where I'm not sure what else to have them do!

By the way...I wasn't good about taking the after pictures,

so the two recipes we made yesterday can be found
here.  This was a yummy pinterest find.  The kids & grown ups (even our neighbors) loved them.

and here, from my dear friend Kim's blog.  She has other yummy recipes on there too!

And just because, I wanted to share this little Easter display we have on a hutch in the kitchen nook.

The book, in case you don't know about it, is "Benjamin's Box."  It is a story that goes with the Resurrection eggs.  I like it a lot.  And everything else was made by my kids.

That plate, Jackson made in class using broken egg shells to create a mosaic.

And the grace garden, each one of them made one in Sunday school this past week.  I was so impressed by the work the teachers put into making that possible for each of them.

it happened & picture me {im}perfectly: fears

We had a rocky morning.


My son couldn't find his shoes.


You know the kind of can't find where they stand frozen in their room staring into space.... somehow this is going to help find them.


It drives me crazy.


Then I realized I hadn't packed up the lunches.  
I usually do them at night.  But spaced.
Only this morning I didn't realize that I had spaced.  
Just thought they were in the fridge waiting, as usual. 
I get anxious about being late to school and the traffic because of the rain.  
Our first real rain this season.
People don't drive well in Southern California when it rains.


Then I remember my son's bike was left outside.  
So I had to add bringing it in and wiping it down
so it won't rust to my already running behind schedule.


Youngest child doesn't like mornings.  Plain and simple.  Would prefer to stay cozy in bed.


And none of them want to eat in the morning.  
They're not hungry.
But to be a proper mother I need to feed them.  
I go through the effort.  Yet they barely touch the food.
And I fear they won't learn well as they discover they truly are hungry and are distracted by the growl in their tummies.


We're searching for umbrellas we haven't needed in months.
Kids aren't dressed warm enough so I'm running back for jackets.


Oldest has a five chapter social studies test, 
I'm telling him to get the notes we worked on last night to study in the car.
He thinks he's good.  
He doesn't like to study.
I fear he will fail.  
I'm learning not to own the things that are his.  
But I still feel responsible.


Middle child gets frustrated by her seatbelt.  
She wants to do it herself, but it twists and gets stuck.  
I try to help her and somehow hurt her hand.  
No idea I even touched her hand.


She's crying.  
I'm a bit exasperated by all of it and am asking 
everyone to please just stop.
Stop the crying, the complaining, the protesting.
And I fear I am not setting a good example.
Not being a good Proverbs 31 woman, 
whose children arise and call her blessed.  
Because I'm not being so patient anymore.


Oh and did I mention my husband had to leave at 5 a.m. to fly
out of town on a job.
A job he told me about last night.  


Then I say I'm sorry that mommy was frustrated.  
And I pray and say lets start again ok.
And I have adult worries on my mind, the kind that I cannot share with my kids.
But they impact my patience, I know.


I'm asking the Lord to center me.  To bring me peace.


And then my daughter says, "I think I swallowed my tooth."
I'm now driving.  I turn around and say, "What?"
She says, "It's gone.  I don't know where it is?"


I then see it sitting on her lap.


And we all laugh.  
And the kids cheer.
Excited that it finally came out.
This child would not pull it at all.
She literally let it fall out all on its own.
She has patience like you wouldn't believe.
I think it's a gift.


And the rest of our drive was spent having her
test out the funny sounds she could make
saying things like
Susie sells seashells by the seashore.


And I have to trust my son will remember 
what he needs to for his test.
My kids won't catch all the sicknesses going around AGAIN.
My appointments that need to get rescheduled won't be a problem.
I'll have time to balance it all.


I have imperfect mornings.  
Little fears that add up and I get anxious 
when I know I need to quiet my mind.  


Because we are to cast our cares on Him.

"Give all your worries and cares to God, 

for he cares about you."

1 Peter 5:7

It says right there ALL your worries
That means, the little and big.  
Rational and irrational.


And that is why I love this part of Zephaniah 3:17 that says. 

"He will quiet you with His love."

I just have to meditate on this... a lot.


And then on the way home I see a car overturned completely 
on a busy street I drive every day.  
It just happened.  
I called 9-1-1to have an ambulance on its way.  
It didn't look good.    




And I felt fear for that person.
Praying they're ok.
And putting my little fears into huge perspective.

this little lady

and I are getting lots of one on one time this past week.

She starts school way after her brother and sister.

And will only go three half days.

This will be my last year with her before 

she begins kindergarten next year.

And quite honestly I find her thoughts just so fun.

She truly is an enlightening little person to be around.

The way her mind thinks,

the way she expresses herself.

She's just plain fun.

So fun in fact that she and I lost track of time.

We took a leisurely walk around our

neighborhood last week.

And on our way around the bend 

I checked my phone to see what time it was.

It was 2:40.

My big kids get out at 2:30.

BAD.

In a nutshell I think my house clock was off 

or my eyes were off.

And I saw 1:30 when it was really 2:30 before we left.

You know those moments where your heart drops.

You have no cell service.

And then when you do, no one you know is answering their phone.

I had a little panic.

I so often say my life feels like a sitcom

or a three ring circus.  

Or both.

And so I was trying to express to my happily skipping

four year old in the 100 degree heat

that we needed to walk a little faster.

A lot faster.

It was only the second day of school.

I was not, still am not completely in the groove yet.

It takes me awhile.

But all is well.

And as far as the kids go.

So far, I couldn't have asked for better.

They love their new school.

And Ava, the Lord is amazing me.

With how quickly He has moved in her life.

I'm being told again and again.

She is raising her hand, not only in class,

but also in chapel in front of the whole school

to answer questions.

And she's getting everything she is learning.

Including her memory verse.

"Lead me in your truth and teach me.

For you are the God who saves me.

All day long I put my hope in you."

Psalm 25:5

She is being her happy goofy self

with new friends, her age and older.  

These things never happened last year.

I'm so, so grateful.

And thank the Lord.

He truly does do

beyond what we can ask or imagine.

And I truly do put my hope in Him alone.

181. time with my youngest

182. great finds at home goods

183. a painting project

184. helping in class 

185. a playdate with sweet twins 

186. new friends who gift us with pretty bows

187. progress with learning

188. a son hungry for the word

picture me {im}perfectly: irresponsible

Lately I know there are things that need to get done.

But I'm doing the bare minimum.

Because summer is about to end for my two older kids.

And I want to do all of those last minute fun things.

So instead of being practical.

Instead of being responsible.

We've gone to the zoo.  (More on that soon!)

We're heading to the beach.

We're going bowling,

And we're having a party.

But ... the closets are a mess.

The desk, another mess.

and my car, well I keep cleaning the windshield at least.

The school supplies aren't sorted or labeled

I have a dining room that is piled with

games to be put away.

I feel like I'm accomplishing a little bit

of a lot of things, but finishing nothing.

Oh, and the trash needs to be taken out.

My husband is gone for the week on a job.

(hence the trash.. I'm sort of old school like that.)

So the groceries can wait.

To-do lists will still be there,

and so will the mess.

It's time to play

and return to it another day!

p.s. Trust me this throwing caution to the wind is very uncharacteristic of me.

But I'm resting in the fact that in a week I'll have the time to start tackling 

the lists yet again.

picture me {im}perfectly: personal care

Ok, so this post is sorta light hearted.


And seriously makes me chuckle.


My kids have certain terms they use to


call mommy's re-growth on my legs.


Which by the way happens way too fast for my liking.


My three year old tells me, "Mommy you have splinters."


And my nine year old son, no matter how many times I correct him


over the years, still tells me, "Mommy your fur is growing in."


It's NOT fur.  Ok.  Humans do not have fur.


Seriously embarrassing.


I swore that I'd never be one of those moms who throws on sweats 


and tennis shoes in the morning.


BUT oh so often I do and I AM that mom.


And I like it.  It's comfortable, so there.


Prior to having kids I had the kind of job where I had to wear a suit 


every day.


I blew out my hair every day.


I got french manicures and pedicures.


That was ten years ago.


Now, I do manage the pedicures, though not as frequently.


And the manicures, long ago I decided with all the hand washing 


we moms do, it's just not worth it.


Over the course of the last ten years, with our growing family's 


needs and morning routine,  mom's personal care


often gets pushed to the back burner.  


I've gotten so good at streamlining my routine.


I know my husband loves that.


The me of a decade ago would have never believed it possible.


I'm not saying I've relegated myself to cavewoman status.


I do still try to put myself together.


It's just the whole shaving thing.... well it doesn't happen every day.


And I'm ok with my (ahem) fur.


Now just give mommy some privacy and I'll go shower! :)

picture me {im}perfectly: playing

I've been sensing something happening in my heart.

A melting.

An awakening.

A freedom that it took these summer days to find.

I'm breathing.

And I'm realizing more and more

these little people that are under my care,

they're fun.

And it's fun being with them.

Playing with them.

Listening to them.

Watching them.

Just hanging out with them.

So often I'm all about taking care of them.

Getting them fed, getting them ready, getting them here and there.

Bathing them, reading to them, praying with them, tucking them in.

You know, the routine.  

The day in and day out.

But somehow in that routine, 

I've become too much of a grown up.  

And I forget to have fun.

Yesterday we all jumped in the pool together

and through my goggle covered eyes

I see them clearly.

Submerged in water, we all circle round and face each other.  

Their fat cheeks holding air,

their wide eyes with flowing hair.

We pretend to sit and see how long we can stay.

And in this moment I feel like a child again.

Memories of summers long gone by come flooding in.

And I'm struck by what a blessing it is that they're

teaching me to play again.  

To be a kid again.

To step out of this world of responsibility.

And to see the gifts right before me.

"You have made known to me the paths of life; 
you will make me full of gladness with your presence."

Acts 2:28

picture me {im}perfectly: stuck

I get stuck.

Stuck at the computer.


Stuck looking up this and that.


Recipes, tiles, party ideas.


Researching and side-tracking.


Some are necessary, some are just fun.

But there really are a million things


I need to accomplish.


And accomplish quickly.


My kids are in VBS for three short hours this morning.


There are beds to be made, dishes to put away,


appointments to follow up on and schedule,


lunches to be packed.


But I get stuck here.


Sometimes I literally have to tell myself.

GET UP!

I also get stuck with a fear of messing up.

I have these pillows I want to make.


I now have the fabric.  


It's a beautifully rich velvet design and color.


I just fell in love.


The scissors are waiting.


But I'm stuck because I don't want to

mess up.

It's a frustrating trait of mine.


Typically once I jump in, it all works out.


But it's that fear of messing up that can


make me freeze.


It's the zipper.


I haven't done one since I was pregnant with my first.


Back then time was limitless and my nesting out of control.


Today, free time is minimal.


So I must get un-stuck.

{im}perfect treasures

This is going to be slightly more light-hearted than usual.
But they're still imperfections.

Confession 1)  I let her stay in her jammies when we take the big kids to school if she doesn't.

Confession 2) Sometimes we run errands on our way back home.... while she's still in jammies.

Confession 3) She has an obsession... and I mean serious obsession with finding treasures.

Confession 4) I let her crawl around on the very dirty floor finding said treasures which are really what most people would consider trash.

But they're jewels and pretty flowers and just absolutely fabulous to her.

And I tell you this child will spot things from a mile away no matter where we are.  She'll see a shine or a sparkle sticking out and more times than I can count she has found one or five dollar bills.


She sees things no one else does.  We walk right past, over and next to what she deems special. 


She has a keen eye and is always on the hunt.  To me that's something unique about her and I let her pursue her treasures.


But I know I look like a careless mom who doesn't dress her child
and lets her get all dirty crawling around the ground.

Confession 5) I'm saving all these petals, beads and baubles.  I plan to glue them to a frame when we have enough.  It'll be a token of this time and this special treasure hunting spirit in her.


Confession 6) I have an affinity for thrifting, finding deals, and dollar bins.   I was known in high school and college to go to the Salvation Army with my Grandma in order to get her Senior Citizen discount.  I guess I love the hunt too.  Finding a simple little treasure, even better if it's a trash to treasure.  And I love stocking up on things I know will be good gifts for others.  So perhaps the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree.  But I do have to be discerning because sometimes those things that will be great gifts for 'one day' pile up in the closet.


Because of the construction at our house turning that closet into a creative space for me I'm taking stock of how much that dollar here, dollar there adds up.  And how many of those things that are good gifts for 'some day' have been tucked away and are completely forgotten.  


In my mission to get myself more organized I'm finding I really need to have these things visible.  I need to see what I have and use what I have before buying another little treasure.  


I'm linking to Capturing Motherhood's picture me {im}perfectly.

Good Enough!

I don't know if I've written about this before.
I probably have to some degree.
But since I can't remember
and since it's one of my {im}perfections
and I was just talking about it with another creative mom friend
it was fresh on my mind.


GOOD ENOUGH!

I've had to teach myself this through the years.


Especially as a mom.  Because time is SO limited!


I literally have had to teach myself to stop.


I think it has something to do with being creative.
I sometimes think creative brains just work differently,
see things differently.


I can work on something and it won't feel right


and I'll have to mess with it till it does.


But honestly no one else would notice.


Sometimes it can be a trap, a stronghold.


I'm so glad to say that the Lord has 
been beyond patient with me in this way.
And He is growing me up.


It's freeing being able to say, "This is Good Enough"
in so many aspects of my life.




Not only creatively, but also in my life as a mom and keeper of my home.


I can spiral into feeling like I'm never doing enough.


Like I can never get caught up... with the messes
and piles and projects waiting to be finished.


Or with my children.


A bad grade, I must not have worked with him enough.


A shy child, I must help her more, help her confidence grow.


Because the world is judging and not understanding.




I say 'can' let this happen, because I'm learning, slowly,
but I'm learning to let them roll off me, to not let
them make me feel like I'm failing.




Do you know those kinds of thoughts?


Really they can torture your mind.


Owning everything.


And honestly NO ONE can do everything right,


be everything for everyone.




But we can do our best with God strengthening us 
through our weakness.




We can do ENOUGH.


And rest in knowing that HE is Lord


and He is abundantly more than ENOUGH for EVERYONE.


We don't have to do it all.



"Be STILL and know that I am God."
Psalm 46:10