insta friday - a season of change

Oh how quiet I have been here.

Life has been full.

And though I've been on pause in many facets of my life.

Many others have been far from quiet.

And so my energy, prayers, concentration have been there.

One of the biggest changes is this little lady

went back to school this past week.

I prayed and labored and cried and prayed

and sought the Lord over this decision.

It was not an easy one to make.

But I knew it was time.

Time to admit that I am not the best teacher for her

right now.  When we began this school year

officially on August 27th much of what she knew

from the last two years appeared to be gone.

And it was scary.

And I had to face the fact that I am

not trained in how to work around this.

I have help.  A wonderful tutor, a language

therapist and an education therapist.

But I had to accept that the few hours a week

of additional help is not getting her where she needs to be.

So there is this very special school just ten minutes from us.

Where every child has dyslexia 

or some form of a language based learning difference.

She is not different.

And every teacher is a trained special education teacher.

And they know just what to do when all the myriad

of challenges arise.

Her class size is 4 kids per teacher.

Broken down so that each group is all at the same learning stage.

So no one feels far behind all the others.  

I knew about this school.

But I also knew it didn't start until 3rd grade.

However, in my feeling like I didn't know what else to do

I called.

Just to see it.

For the future.

And on that tour I learned this year they

went down to second. 

So there's one class that is a 2/3 split.

Which is just perfect for her because

technically she should be in third.

But because of repeating kindergarten

she is doing 2nd grade work this year.

And so it felt like a gift.

I know the whole feeling that if God

calls you to something he'll equip you.

He'll fill in the gap.

But he also sends help.

And so I see this as a gift.

A life raft he has sent to us.

While last year homeschooling was such a beautiful experience.

This year was already proving to not be what's best for her.

I am trusting that great things are going to happen here

this year, and I'm just praying for the Lord to unlock doors.

My education therapist has guided me in decisions for the last three years.

She is on the dyslexia board and I trust her.

When she said this is such a crucial age.

This is when we need to get her over this hurdle

so that she doesn't slip further behind.

So here we are.

And this week overall, I'd say was a success.

There were some tears, and anxiety.

But she is happy.

And was so excited for bring your pet to school day.

She also did something for the first time ever.

Something many kids do years earlier.

She sat down and wrote and illustrated a little book.

And then read it to us at bedtime.

Just for fun.

You see these natural developmental things,

they're not fun when it's all so much labor.

But she did it, just because.

And that is a sign to me that things are working.

To say this decision has weighed heavy on my heart

is an understatement.

So when this little lady out of nowhere told me,

"You know you're a one million infinity times 134 cool mom" 

it was just the encouragement I needed.

She is getting used to our days without her sister.

That has been hard too.

'

My instagram pics have been quiet too, so this will be quick.

We went to a beautiful beach baptism last week.

Played with friends.

I got a super cool Girl Scouts handbook from

1972 from one of the vintage sellers I follow

on instagram.  Oh I just can't help myself.

It was 2.00 and I think will be so cute in the girls

room.  Not to mention it's slightly sentimental for me.

It was published the year I was born, and I was a 

girl scout for years with my mom as the leader.

I'm loving this sweet October owl she's working on

in art class.

And we finally connected with some dear friends

for much needed fellowship.

The kids had a candlelit dinner.

And afterwards we played spades while

being fueled by these yummy pumpkin spice chai lattes!

 (the ladies won by the way!! hee hee....

this is like a three year ongoing rivalry) 

Cheers to a new week beginning.

New promises.

And His ever present hand in all things.

I'm resting in knowing that I have 

a God of angel armies by my side.

insta friday - catching up

Oh it has been awhile hasn't it friends?

I have so much to say.

But for now no time to do so.

So, here is a little instagram recap of the last two weeks.

I'll start with school clothes.

They don't really need 'school clothes', but it's still fun for these girls to shop.

They like it much more than me.  I am not a shopper.  

But their dad promised them a new outfit.

And so it didn't matter that it has been in the 100's.  

They're ready for fall and are going to dress like it.  

I love their little styles.  

And these pants, can I just get a pair in my size already?

Not only are they comfy looking, but the little bows.

School has been rougher this year than I expected.  More on that soon.  

I documented this moment because it was a peaceful one.

One where no one was upset or crying.  Including me.

I'm only kind of joking here.

And this fur-baby of mine she took center stage a bit on my instagram feed.

The Rhonna app was free one day, so I had some fun playing around with it.

Love that squishy face.

And this is how she sleeps, all the time.  It cracks me up. Not a care in the world.

She and my middle

one who is quite the animal whisperer they hang together a lot.  And when Piper wants

her company, she'll literally bark at her til she joins her.  She is super vocal in letting

us know she literally just wants our love.  It's pretty sweet actually.  Here they're

bird and squirrel watching.  Never a dull moment I tell you.

Oh my, it's already starting to be too dark to see the sunrise on my way to my

spinning class.  But for weeks I would be greeted by the most glorious display

of God's handiwork in the early morning.  You just can't help but feel like it's going

to be a good day starting it out this way.

I've had some super happy mail lately.

I fell in love with these cute and necessary alphabet cards

from cottage industry's sweet shop.

She so kindly included a little surprise. 

And you all must know by now that I LOVE

books.  Used books, new books, vintage books especially.

And I also LOVE Tasha Tudor.

I follow quite a few vintage sellers on instagram.

And books are my weakness.

So when I happened to log on to see

Tasha Tudor's Christmas book "Take Joy"

just listed.  And no one had claimed it yet.

OH I just had to. 

She is one of my biggest inspirations 

as an artist and a person.  

I just think she was one amazing lady.

This book is filled with Christmas stories,

sheet music, recipes and neat little tidbits about

her own Christmas celebrations.

And imagine my delight when I opened it

to discover that inside she had signed the book herself.

It'll be fun to look through this year after year.

On to other things.

My husband takes the girls to run errands.

And texts me pictures like this.

My son tried out for a traveling baseball team

and the season has begun.  So we're in full swing

with games and practices.  

It's a whole new group of boys and families

and a whole new experience. 

So far so good!

And they practice at a park where lots of people

are working out.

So the girls and I have decided to get some

exercise with Miss Piper too.

The table set and decorated by the girls.

And power outages, not so fun.

But making the most of it,

reading by flashlight.

And this truth is speaking to me right now.

 "Our hearts are like a sensitive 

photographers plate; in order to have God 

revealed there, we must sit at His feet a long time."

Sometimes we have hard decisions to make.

I know I can feel at times like I'm not sure

where God's voice is.  I don't hear it as clearly

as I'd like.

And so this fact, that sitting, just sitting at His feet.

for a "long time." It's important.

Not to rush or be rash.  

But to make sure we're giving God time

to reveal himself in our heart.  

It's a pretty beautiful thought

and something I know we need to practice.

And this bridge, it just makes me happy.

As does having kids over for dinner playdates,

with the chaos of racing cars and scooters spinning 

through the house.

It takes me back to those toddler and preschool days.

When there weren't classes, and practices,

and homework.

Oh look at their joy. 

I just love it.

is it friday already again?

I know I shouldn't complain.

Fridays are fun days.

But my oh my, the weeks are just speeding by.

School begins for us on Tuesday.

I'm excited. 

And nervous.

And in full planning mode.

Trying to wrap my brain around schedules.

And three.

Three kids at home for school this year.

And how to attend to their needs.

And one on one time.

And how to keep the others occupied

while one or more need that one on one time.

Without losing their attention.

It's enough to send my heart racing a bit.

Cause I have one who if you lose her, you lose her big time.

And the emotions and the reeling back in.  It's tough.

And it triggers anxiety in me.

Which is good for no one.

So I try to keep it to a minimum.

And then I realize that I may not be able to wrap my 

brain around how all of this will work until I'm just in it.

And I find my way as it unfolds.

Because so often we can plan and schedule and map out

and then we realize our plans don't really work.

But my tendency is to map out.

Because my brain needs a map.

I like guidelines.

I'm a rule kind of girl.

Tell me the directions, and I'll see it through.

Every last detail.

And right now, with our new curriculums 

and adding a SIXTH grader.

My brain is feeling a bit like it needs to read the map.

But I've learned I need to be flexible with that map.

Because life happens.

And life very rarely stays the way you imagine.

And that I think has been a very important lesson in my life as a mom.

In learning to let things go, and to go more with the flow.

So my planning nature is planning, but with the caveat that

all those plans have wavy margins and wiggle room.

Cause with three young-ish wigglers, a dog, a trio of chickens,

doorbells, spills, hunger, fights, tears, make ups, you know, life. 

With interruptions galore we need lots of wiggle room 

so that my well laid plans can be a guide, but a guide

with breathing room.  

And space to play, so that prayerfully we have margins in our schedule

to keep that peaceful pace I so desperately want to hold onto this year.

So ... here is a little bit of my insta friday update.

I didn't do much posting this week I've realized.  But it's ok.

Life has been busy getting organized!

And making things pretty.

I think I mentioned a bit ago that I am loving

the vintage sellers on instagram.

I came in at the very end of this insta sale.

And these were the last vintage postcards being sold.

I initially thought that I'd put a couple in my daughter's

room.  But that girl with the bird in the bonnet.

She just felt too right in this little spot on my side of the office.

 I can get completely side tracked in organizing with making things pretty.

And you know what, I'm ok with that.  Because having little bits of inspiration

fuel my creativity and help me be more productive.  Yea, I may be justifying a bit.

But it's true, don't you think?

Soon I'll share our curriculum choices for this year.

Things have evolved and changed a bit even from where

I thought we were heading.

But that's ok.

It's all part of that unpredictable life thing.

Here's one thing I'm super excited about for my son.

A study for just him and I and to do together.

I know without a shadow of a doubt that 

at the end of this, it'll be powerful and he'll have

learned a lot.  And that is what he is hungry for.

He loves studying the bible and sometimes

gets so frustrated when things are dumbed down for kids.

So that is part of why I chose this.

I know it won't be dumbed down at all and it'll

equip him with solid backing for when he is challenged.

And if I have one goal for him out of homeschooling.

Well, I have two.

One is to regain his love of learning.

The second is to channel his already attorney/lobbyist 

strengths into being a warrior for Christ.

There are things about his personality that can be exhausting

as a mom.

But I've always said I know God has made him

this way for a purpose.

And it's my job to stand strong,

unemotional,

and to channel his strengths and determination

in positive directions.

Oh that and I also always pray

Lord help me train him well for his wife.

Let me help him see the hows and whys women

need what they need and why they work the way they work.

Because we are confusing creatures I know.

But being understanding and compassionate to all of that.

It's important.

But I digress.

Let's get back to insta friday!

My sister lives in New York.

Sigh.

And we see her now only a couple of times a year.

She came out for a visit with her son, husband, and his brother and sister.

My parents came up and we made a trip to the Getty

for their family concert and a picnic.

It was a beautiful day.

And my kids LOVE playing with their cousin.

Little discoveries around my house... a baby

hawk making lots of noise.

And a mama swooping around

quite a bit.

Commotion in the kitchen led me to 

find her where she very much knew

she shouldn't be.

Busted.

Look at her trying not avoid eye contact.

And this guy has begun physical therapy for his 

wrist.  From the break and the sprain that

they thought could have been a fracture or

a torn ligament (praise God it wasn't) he's

just a bit weak.  So he has to strengthen it

before he gets the green light to play sports.

Which I know is killing him.

But should be motivation to

do the work!

Meanwhile she's trying to show me

how strong her hand is.  

Putting your face into it,

that seems to help.

Happy Friday everyone!

Hope you have a wonderful weekend.

insta friday

Since I left you last week..

We enjoyed the beach with my sweet friend 

Hil from capturing motherhood

and her gang.

It was a later in the day kind of trip.

While most were leaving,

we were just arriving

for a picnic dinner and plenty of play.

I couldn't think of any place I'd rather be.

We took a trip to the Getty

as the sun was setting.

I loved this exhibit.

And coming out to the beautiful crescent moon.

I start every Monday with a very early morning

work out.

This week many schools began and so

the LA traffic has increased dramatically.

Sitting at the light I was thinking about

two mottos I want to hold onto right now.

You can't be comfortable and courageous.  

So here's to 

UNCOMFORTABLE COURAGE!

And as all of the hustle and bustle picks up,

don't get caught up in the race. 

Keep the pace of peace.

Remember my getaway alone?

My pace of peace.

I don't want to lose it as the

school year starts and the schedules fill in.

In fact, I'm really trying to look at how

to simplify our routine.

And cut out where we can.

Especially being on the road.

This week has been filled 

with playdates, and sleepovers,

coloring,

and swimming.

And really super creepy discoveries.

Which led to a call to an exterminator.

Who'll use natural oils.

But will help me get rid of these buggers.

That are literally giving me the creepy crawlies.

And I've been educated on all kinds of things.

Like that is a brown widow.  

I've been finding and killing these eggs since the spring.

The discovery of this one when a friend went

to put on our goggles.  ACK.

NOT GOOD.

They had been hanging on the pool fence 

for only a few days.

That's how fast this happened.

Ok.  Moving on.

Cause I'm gonna start itching if 

I talk more about this.

We've been running errands.

Gearing up for the school year.

I'm not gonna lie.

Sometimes it's hard seeing pictures of the kids

my older daughter started kindergarten with

as they begin third grade.

I loved that school.

And I had no idea at the time that we'd

be saying goodbye to it.

No idea that two years later I'd be homeschooling.

And even though I know we're where we're supposed to be.

Sometimes my heart aches for the fact

that things are so tough for her.

And that it all didn't turn out in the traditional way.

But then her younger sister will bust out

with the most profound statements.  

And my heart melts a little.

Here's what I posted with this instagram pic.

==================================

This sweet girl is always sharing her thoughts.

This morning her take on homeschooling.

Of course she doesn't know any different.

But I love her take on it.

"I love homeschooling because you're

learning the same things,

but in a more easy kid way.

Like you learn in little steps

instead of big steps that are too much.

But then all those little steps make big steps

til it's one humongous step 

and you know a lot."

I've never relayed anything like this to her before.

I think it's her interpretation of what her sister

experienced in school vs. homeschool.

===================================

Each Monday this summer her sister has had an appointment with

her old ed therapist.   Her office is half way to the beach

so we've made it our routine to head there afterwards.

It's a routine I'll be sad to see go.

I finally got my printer back from the shop.

And was able to get my orders off in the mail.

It's always such a good feeling getting caught up.

Although I'm never really fully caught up.

I discovered this cracked egg ... 

which made me look up.

Didn't even realize there was a nest there.

Just hoping that baby cracked out himself  

and didn't die?

My youngest wanted me to find a couple

of old pictures for a locket of hers.

Scrolling through iphoto.

Coming across these pictures and more, 

it just made me ache.

How has the time gone so fast already?

Oh I just want to squeeze her.

And this.

My son has been through many phases.

This was the cut paper, use wrapping ribbon,

tape and scissors and create.

EVERY SINGLE DAY.

And you know what. 

He was mighty creative.

Seeing this reminded me

that he has always been 100% into

whatever he is into.

Hmmmm...

Hoping to channel that into school this year.

Have I told you all that he's

joining us in our homeschool adventure this year???

I dont' think I have.

The decision has been made for quite some time.

But I think I haven't had the energy to really journal about it here.

So I'll be doing first grade, second grade and sixth grade with them.

Eventually I'll fill you all in on curriculum choices etc.

I'm excited, and scared.

But God will equip.

I know that.

It will be an adventure for sure.

School starts August 26th for us.

The countdown is on.

But before I leave you today.

I must share this show our girls presented for us.

We were given tickets,

were given our opening greeting

which included the rules of picture taking.

"Two during the show and three during the finale."

And then the rose fairy and snow fairy

serenaded us with God songs and interpretive dance.

Do you remember putting on shows for your parents?

I do.

It was fabulous.

And this was her stance when telling her dad,

"Yes he could take a work call,

but he must hurry up and come back

for the finale."

Here's to a happy Friday and weekend!